I'm Just Sayin...
Is A Mid-Life Crisis Real?
4/16/2011 5:00:04 PM
A traditional mid-life crisis was defined in the 1970’s (studies show 80% of people had one) as occurring between 40-55 in both men and women. It’s was a time when advancing age triggered a realization of the passing of youth, a decline in physical health and a fear of death.

 It was often associated with/caused by hormonal changes, empty nest syndrome, unhappiness with job, divorce, death of a close family member and a realization that youthful goals won’t be achieved. This caused the individual to become introspective and examine all areas of their life including family, friends and career. 

This was frequently accompanied by thoughts of self doubt along with questions of "what if” and "am I really happy?” This led to major life changes for some but most folks came through this eventually with a new, happier view of the world, more realistic expectations and an acceptance of who and what they are as they finally, gracefully accepted growing old.

The traditional midlife crisis is now becoming obsolete based on modern studies. Numerous studies since 1990 show no definable "mid-life crisis” while others peg the rate as low. The question is why?

Education and insight: Most people today start examining who and what they are at a much younger age. They tend to be more philosophical and realistic. The rising divorce rate at a younger age, frequent job changes and a desire for immediate gratification are all examples that we aren’t going to wait 20 years and wake up one day and realize, "I’m not happy”.

Better health: 40-55 really was the transition to old age 40 years ago. Now with a better diet, more exercise and better medical care all leading to longer life spans, middle age for many can carry into the late 60s or beyond and the added wisdom at that age makes a crisis less likely.

Better treatment options: for the hormone imbalances caused by menopause and andropause.

Better mental health: Recognition and treatment for depression and willingness to see a mental health professional for counseling to deal with stressful issues like empty nest, death of a relative or a problematic marriage.

Over use of the term "mid-life crisis”: The stereotypical behaviors that come to mind have actually brought awareness which has caused a decline in the condition as nobody wants to be labeled as "That guy/girl”

With that being said, a small percent of the population will suffer some type of crisis. Steps you can take to avoid becoming a statistic center around making your life the happiest it can be now:

Get healthy: If you’re healthy you have more energy to do/accomplish the things you want to do. The big 3 of diet, exercise and sleep become more crucial as we age. 

See your Doctor: Have an annual physical to make sure some hidden medical problem is not causing a problem.
 
Talk, talk, talk: Address problems as they occur with work, spouse, kids, family friends. Don’t let little things build up over time to become a major life issue.

Financial planning/discussion: Disagreement over money is the number 1 cause of marital discord, divorce and unhappiness in romantic relationships.

Like your job: Those that are more satisfied/fulfilled with their job are happier over all.

Have lots of connections: Those with 10 or more friends/close relatives live on average 7 years longer than those with 5 or less. They also get sick less and are happier.

Mental health professional: Be willing to see a therapist/psychiatrist if needed to deal with a loss, empty nest, marital problems or depression.

Acceptance: You can’t turn back the hands of time no matter how hard you try. Rather than becoming a participant in our youth obsessed culture, embrace the power that comes from experience, wisdom and knowing yourself which are all benefits of age.

So there you have it, another casualty/benefit from our modern, fast paced, narcissistic world. The only question now is with the mid-life crisis on the way to extinction, what will take it’s place?

Posted by: Dr. Dale Archer | Submit comment | Tell a friend

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5 Comments
1/15/2012 5:15:54 PM
Mid-life crisis still exists. I have a major birthday coming up next month, which I totally dread and want to forget... It's not that I am not happy the way I conducted my life so far, or that I am unhappy with my looks. My choices, right or wrong, could not be others, as my character forced me to these choices. That means I had no choice. So I can't blame the genes, nor my parents. Appearance, I look better than 20 years ago, but just because it is now that I care more than back then, and also I know how to dress and accesorise, which I never knew (or cared to know) when I was 20. Money, I definitely have more, than when I was 20. So, if I am so much better off now, why do I dread the number 40? It's only the number, which I dread. Nothing else. Except those horrible numbers getting bigger. If you think about it, you might agree, the numbers are the only problem. Because they act as a reminder, of some unpleasant things, which could really happen at any age. Is there a way to forget about the numbers? Who invented time and the numbers? They should have never been invented. It makes me stressed and thinking I have to rush, to get where I want to get. Just because my birthday is coming soon. However, I was always rushing and trying hard, ever since I was 16. Probably, rushing never stops. So why do we need to put a stop label, as the numbers get bigger? I have so much more rushing to do. :-)
DDA
1/15/2012 11:22:24 PM
They say 40 is the new 30, and you're right, Marcia -- it's just a number. Do you know Betty White? If not, she's a comedienne who acted during the '70's and '80's. Then, she appeared on a very funny commercial for Snickers during Super Bowl XLIV, and her popularity took off again. At 88 years old, a facebook page was created, with about 500,000 signatures of all ages begging her to host Saturday Night Live, which she did. The ratings went through the roof. Now at 90, she has a calender, with all proceeds going to animal charities and she has her own show. It looks like she does not have a stop label, Marcia, so why should you?
1/16/2012 6:47:25 PM
She must be so great to have this determination and stamina! I am willing also, to put many more years of sacrifices. However I wish I could know the level of my maximum, and to judge already now if I am happy with it. So far I am happy, but I always want more. There is always someone else in another city or country who has done more, and I admire. Either through work, or through charisma, or both. But if I don't reach further, as I imagine, I will be very unhappy. This is the 'argument' I used to have with my mother some years ago. She said 'if God would not plan to allow you to go further, He would take away from you this passion. He wouldn't let you struggle for no return'. But (as nice as this would be) we can't sign a contract with God, asking Him to let us know how far we can go. And meanwhile, He doesn't remove my passion.
1/17/2012 7:15:15 AM
P.S. Also I am worried, not about popularity (that is most times irrelevant to value) but whether I can get real worth, if I can be what I imagine, or not. Some of my colleagues, said they could see quite early in life, that they wouldn't reach the highest level, which they wanted, and so they gave up and changed careers early enough. Although I know their heart aches, when I say I am still trying, doing things, while they are not. It takes big guts to keep trying, but it probably takes even bigger guts to decide to give up. I belong to the category of those who still want to try... :-)
2/2/2012 9:47:03 AM
I have only 21 days left, to manage my goals... before the dreadful -just a- number! What a panic...! Unbelievable (so as not to say unforgivable)! When I think about it I am shaking inside, I really don’t want to have a birthday, so I better book a commitment to disappear in 21 days :-)
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